My new favourite Recipe

I found this recipe in an old cookbook of my grandmother's, and I figured everybody would appreciate it:

Elephant Soup

1 Medium Elephant (African is best)
500 gallons hot water
2 pecks onions, finely chopped
1 bushel potatoes, peeled and sliced
5 shovels salt
3 shovels pepper
1 1/2 cases Worcestershire Sauce
10 bottles rum, or more if cooking time is longer or you are expecting more than 8 guests
Coke to taste
5 quarts peanut oil (optional)

Method:

Mix 1 1/2 oz rum with coke. Drink. Wash and dry the elephant (don't use soap as this will spoil the flavour). In back of a 1/2 ton truck, or rented U-Haul, pour hot water. Have another rum and coke and add elephant, spuds, and other ingredients. Allow to simmer. Meanwhile, finish first bottle of rum. Stir mixture using canoe paddle or small outboard motor. When guests arrive, start them off with the remaining rum. **The peanut oil won't really add to the soup, but it is the way the elephant would have wanted it!!!!**


P.S. I don't really approve of cooking elephants.....No elephants were harmed in the writing of this recipe.....